orange segment

Really. I love food blogs. I was reading The Pioneer Woman Cooks and it made me wish I was a food blogger. And then I read her other blog The Pioneer Woman and it made me wish I was a self-taught photographer who lives on a cattle ranch with four kids and a cowboy husband. Then I realized I was experiencing blog envy.

I never used to read blogs. I barely knew what they were. I came late to the blogosphere as I do to most parties. I show up at midnight (I’m not twenty-two anymore, parties start at 7 or 8 pm in my almost-forty age bracket) and all the canapes have been eaten and the ice has melted. I come late to parties, not because I don’t want to go, but I’m a tad bit — and I’ll admit it here — lazy. I would rather sit on the couch with a rabbit and a cat than get up. This was one of the greatest challenges I faced as a musician who started gigging relatively late in life. Learning to leave the house at 8 PM fully aware that I would not return until 2 AM was a hard thing to learn. Once I left the house, I was fine, but leaving…that was a bitch. So, my late arrival to the blogging party is no great mystery. But, as a result, I see and read great blogs that have had years to develop, while I’m still in the first year trying to learn how to upload photos. I didn’t read these great blogs at the beginning when they were still figuring out themselves, what they were writing about, and to whom they were writing. Instead, I read the blogs now when they are fully-developed and immensely popular and it makes me feel as if my blog is a useless effort. What I really wish is not that I was a great food blogger, but that I wasn’t a “newbie” blogger. I hate being new to things. I hate stumbling around the dark learning to do things. I wanted to be really good at it right now.

Learning to keep up on a blog, has been a lot  like learning to play the drums two years ago. I had to learn to accept that I was learning. I had to learn to be patient with myself. I had to learn the basics, (Hello, rubber practice pad) and then I had to spend a lot of time not playing but just listening to drummers to learn how they played. For blogging this means I have had to read more blogs. I have had to find blogs I like and then when I found them, I have to get over hating them for being so good. Pioneer Woman was like that for me when I found her blog last week while I was looking for a cinnamon roll recipe. There she was all talented and happy and it just made me sick. I wanted to be talented and happy.

That’s when I had to stop. Wait a minute…I am happy, and I’m not untalented. Am I? That’s when I had to look around and see what I had going for me.

1. I’ve got a blog.

2. I am a chick drummer

3. I have a rabbit

4. I have four working limbs, two working eyeballs, and a mostly functioning brain (minus that bit I lost during college, but I didn’t need it anyway).

5. I’m married to a guy I actually really like a lot (as opposed to being married to someone you just sort of like, and that happens)

6. The rent is paid

7. I’m not hungry

So, when I put it all together, I thought, life is not that bad. I’m lucky. Things are good. I’m not a food blogger with a million hits a month and that’s fine. I’m what I’ve heard referred to as a “small blogger.” I like that. It makes me feel like I lost 15 pounds.

So, here’s not to being a food blogger. But, if you really like food blogs, then go to The Slow Cook and check out his blog roll, because I’m still not sure about how to add blogs to my roll.

(Note: And I just have to tell you that while I was writing this, my rabbit went in the bathroom and ate a tampon.)